Lessons

Well, this past week was somewhat disappointing. I had two interviews, with the same company, only to find out that they chose someone else for the position. This was a really good job and a really good opportunity for me to get into the medical field. My hubby has yet to hear anything back from the places he's applied to. The job market is really tough out there right now!

But I think I'm finally starting to understand why we haven't been able to get past this hump. It has nothing to do with God not doing his job or that we have done something so wrong that He is ignoring us. I will be honest, there were times when I thought we were going through this because we must have really screwed up. And also times when I felt like I was screaming at the top of my lungs while God just turned His ear from me. But after spending some more time in His presence this past weekend I think I'm finally hearing His voice again and starting to understand this all...maybe at least a little...maybe.

God uses every situation for good, right? He gives us trials and makes us struggle sometimes to teach us lessons, right? And of course, He won't ever give us something more than what we can handle, right? Well, I'm sure there's going to be a situation in the future where God is going to have us cross paths with someone who may be going through a similar situation as we are now. Going through this now will help us be able to minister to those people. Score! I also have always hated the "p" word: patience. I have never been very patient. God has been working with me on this patience thing for awhile now, but I really think I'm starting to get it. It's been extremely difficult to "give it all to Him" in certain situations. And I really think He's been waiting for me to finally give it all up. I have no control over this situation, only He does. When He feels like we're ready for the next step, whether it's harder or easier, He'll do it. Not us. We can only do so much to change our circumstances. God's got control of the rest.

And sometimes I think He wants to test us in how faithful and close we'll continue to walk with Him through situations. Keith and I were talking about our situation last night. I always thought that when I got into a tough spot, that I would handle it like a champ. Keith always thought that he would be a complete basket case. Well, guess what? We're in this situation, and our attitudes are the opposite of what we thought. Keith's been so strong through this and really faithful. I've been struggling so much. I've wanted this to be over so quickly and felt like I deserved for it to be over. But, whether God feels I deserve it or not, He wants to see just how faithful we are and how close we'll really walk with him through this, in order to bless us later.

Okay, well I guess I'm done venting...for now. I hope that this will eventually help someone with what they're going through. A good friend once told me that if she had to go through all her rough times again just to help someone else out, she would. Now I know what she means. I would go through this all over just know it's helping someone else. My word to you: Continue to be faithful and walk with the Lord. He'll get you through this. And in His timing, He'll bless you so tremendously. It'll all be worth it in the end! It will get used for good! You CAN do it, no matter how hard it may seem right now!